An edited conversation:

Steven:     Hello? Have heard from National Trust…
Aidan:       I always preferred English heritage anyway

Steven:    National Trust have said yes.

Aidan:      Fuck! I love the national trust:)

Steven:   down side, National Trust have asked to know what the film is about.

Aidan:    Ha they’ll love it. Er….. Tell them it’s Atonement 2: Electric Boogaloo

Steven:    Emailed them as you suggested we have been blacklisted

The Story So Far by Aidan Goatley

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Right so The Decoys all started about 5 years ago when Iain Smith wanted to make a war movie. He wanted to make a short ten minute film that could be used as a test for a much larger story idea he had based on the exploits of his Grandfather.

Trust me when I say that if that film ever gets made it will be amazing.

The 10 minute film I wrote for him thankfully never will. It was called ‘A Walk in the Woods.’

It was awful.

It involved a platoon of British Soldiers making their way to the Allied lines through a forest and were picked off one by one by a German sniper.

It had all the dramatic nuance of a squashed Halibut and has as much impact as David Cameron has on the word ‘Sincere.’

One day I sat down with Mr Smith and Steve Keevil and it became pretty obvious that we may have a better chance if we changed the script a little. (This is the diplomatic way of saying the idea was S@it and needs a complete rewrite.)

and so over several versions it has now changed from a drama to a comedy and is called The Decoys.

It’s still mostly set in a wood but this time there is no horrible overly dramatic dialogue and is with any luck considerably less pretentious.

It has also gone further and is now a small pilot film for a potential series that has been developed by myself and Steve Keevil.

I’ve already got an idea about some of the parts and we’re also going to try and get a ‘name’ for a cameo role.

More info will follow

The Goatley

The one on the right.

The one on the right.

 

Aidan is a poor excuse for a human being. he pretends to be a writer when really all he’ll ever be is a really bad retail manager.

as a retail manager he is even worse than a writer but has somehow convinced people to help him make such classics as …… well he’s made some stuff. Some people laughed. he’s sure of it.

When he’s not being bad at writing or being a retail manager he does stand up and has hardly had any fruit thrown at him but was once introduced with the words “…You may think he’s shit but here’s Aidan Goatley.” Which was nice.

Aidan is married and has a daughter who will be so embarrassed by his films / stand up / retail career in a few years time.

Still the one on the right

Still the one on the right

12 second status updates

Frank

The Decoys

Because even two cowards with an idea

coming-soon

The Decoys Blog, is for projects being written and produced by Steven Keevil and Aidan Goatley.

 As soon as Aidan gets back from holiday, he’ll be writing us a little bio about himself.

And soon we will be letting you in on what projects we’ve done, and what we have planned to do, so I hope you join us on this little adventure.

Steve